Losing my mojo

I can't believe that it was three years ago that I started this blog. I have no idea where the time has gone. But reading back, as I have been lately, it has been a roller coaster few years and what and how I am writing has definitely changed.

I always set out for this to be my head space and somewhere to vent, celebrate and explore but recently it has become very much a diary of my life as opposed to any attempts at creative writing. I guess that it is inevitable really with what is going on at the moment; starting a business and working on my own IS a lot harder and mentally draining than I thought (don't get me wrong, I am thoroughly enjoying it) but I don't want to think or feel that I have lost my writing mojo. Thoughts and ideas for stories and little poems used to come so easily and freely but now, well, even if something comes to me, it is straight back out there as my head fills with business 'stuff'. I have sat down so many times to write, wanting that inspiration to hit me, but nothing. Maybe those things that happen in life that inspire you to write aren't really happening to me.

I hope it hasn't gone for good and just a temporary measure whilst my brain is busy being creative spreadsheets, business plans and invoices. Any hints or tips for it not to vanish into oblivion (a bit like my supposed VAT registration) would be much appreciated.

In the mean time, I am just going to read back to some of my favourites about times finding love,
losing words , reading signs and the Rescue of Green Number 10

Nothing but a ramble

I know that I need to write, well not need, but I want to write. My problem is that at the moment I don’t know what to write about.

So, I am going to do what I do best and ramble on.

One of the main reasons for not writing the kind of material that I want to is that I just don’t seem to have had the time or the head space to sit and think. Don’t get me wrong, I am enjoying being busy but I know sooner or later I am going to burn out. As my Nan keeps saying ‘You can’t burn the candles at both ends’ I think she is just jealous!

Work has been stressful and I have been very busy which has led to a whole manner of frustrations. I have mentioned before the lack of business sense from the top, well this has been more evident of late and some very silly mistakes have been made. What do you do? Give the boss a warning? As it is I have to tell him what to do most of the time.

So, busy days at work have either meant I am taking work home or I am going straight out for dinner with friends or to the local theatre (I saw Ballet Boyz last week at The Point who were amazing) or I am visiting family and sorting out their problems. My day never stops.

My only release at the minute is Twitter – I can dive in at any time, talk to people and lose myself in someone else’s world which is quite comforting at the moment. I know I can go there to be cheered up. At the moment if fills a little void in my life, the only thing it can’t do is give me a hug, which is what I seem to be craving at the moment. Virtural ones are good though.

Socially, I am going out more that I think I did in my late teens. But the difference is the confidence I have and the attitude of not caring what others think. If I want to dance like a fish out of water in the middle of an open space – I will. I simply do not care because I am having fun. Much to the dismay of my younger sister who is occasionally subjected to my ‘freaky behaviour’ I can’t say it enough. I don’t care! The only thing I wish was the same as my teens & twenties was my ability to cope with a hangover. Seriously! Where did the three day hangover hell come from? And the blues? What is that all about?

I have new friends and I have old friends, I have friends that I want to meet and I know that someday I will. In all this there is still a gap that I want to be filled, but I know it will happen at some point I only hope that I am not too busy to see it and therefore miss it.