Tuesday, 15 June 2010

Getting it off my chest

Ever get that feeling where you just want to scream from the top of your lungs and name everyone who has ever hurt or let you down?

I want to do that.

I am not sure whether I am burning out following a very busy start the the year, well actually it is the first half of the year, or whether I am just having a 'moment', but it doesn't feel good.

I was just reading this blog post by Karen, and can totally empathize with the feeling of being a little boat on the big seas. Of late, I have been OK riding the choppy waves, in fact I have enjoyed the buzz and the 'Go Go Go', but all of a sudden, I can see a wave brewing in the distance and I am not quite sure how I am going to ride it or attempt to get over it.

What is stopping me from being able to climb the wave is my past, more specifically, past hurts.
Those that have lied, betrayed me and stamped on my heart and left me with little trust in people, a jealous eye and a barbed-wire fence around my heart.

I know this is a low spot, and maybe all I need is a holiday. It has been almost a year since I had any more than a day off - let alone a decent break. I know that I have taken a nose-dive from where I was three, even two weeks ago and I know I will return to those heights again.

But for now, a little moan and whinge and the acceptance that the past happened and I have to get over it, is all I can do in preparation for the bigger waves.

Oh, and a hug might help.


2 comments:

Stray said...

Yes, I do have a confession.

Are you offering to take it?

Jo said...

Hello! I have been told I am a good listener.