Inspiration

I have just been uploading all my photos from Australia - I should be working but I don't want to, I want to keep looking at my photos, keep adding lines and words to my many pieces of writing. I almost have too much to say, too many ideas. I don't know how to start.

I think I might start with colours, I have this photo as my wallpaper; all I can think of is candyfloss clouds.

I am becoming impatient with my tiredness.

Drone of jet lag

I am so very tired. My body aches and my head feels fuzzy. My eyes are heavy and if I stare long enough the shutters come down.
I wonder if anyone would notice if I did have a snooze.

However tired I feel, I am so enthused and inspired. My adventure down under has given me impetus to write and paint - I have so many colours in my mind, so many words, stories and thoughts and not just of what happened on my trip but thoughts of me, what I want and what I know.
I just wish my eyes would stay open long enough and I could support my arms long enough over my keyboard to extract my expressions and impressions. I picture it like a rainbow coming out of the top of my head - full of colour and life.

Journey

My journey to you was long, across sand dunes I struggled.
A meadow of sand under the afternoon sun.
Shadows from the ripples slither underfoot.
My feet sink.
The sand soft, my legs trudge on, feeling heavy with the weight of my heart and my thoughts of you.
What have I done.
Over one last dune, I am nearly there.
I reach the top, the sand becomes harder; it supports my hope.
But only for a moment for I have a long way to go; the dunes are endless.
My journey to you is never ending.

You

As my sun sets, yours awakes.
As my day ends, yours begins
We rely on the written word
I wish you could hear my voice, I would tell you to be strong and that your heart will be whole again, that soon our million little pieces will be sculptured into a beautiful star, one that shines the brightest, one that gives hope.
The one that dreams are created and wishes made on.

Stars

We are so far away yet so close
Our thoughts connect under a star lit sky.
We are opposite sides yet they sparkle the same
Under a universe of possibilities and dreams

Leaving on a jet plane....

I am going to Australia tomorrow for 3 weeks. I am very excited.
I am hoping to learn more about myself and perhaps find out who I am. I will have plenty of time on my own, to be absorbed by thoughts and to observe the world from my little bubble.
I hope to be inspired. I am looking forward to feeling alone and overwhelmed at the thought of how far away I am from everything and everyone I currently know.

I am going to Byron Bay. I was told by a clairvoyant that it was a special place for me and that I have a soul group there. I am wondering how to announce my arrival.

I want to bring a wombat home with me - they are stupid and cute.

Hopefully I will be here as often as I can.
Be back soon with lots to write about.... hopefully.

Internal conversations

I am at work listening to the crazy man on the street below. He appears most mornings around 10 am and is always shouting whilst he walks in a circle. In the physical sense, he is always on his on but mentally I think there are always people around him - they follow him and he shouts at them.

Yesterday he was telling somebody to stop trying to psycho- analyse him, that they will never break him. He finished the conversation by calling them "the C word". I was embarrassed for the mum with her daughter in a push chair who walked past just as he shouted it.

His conversation today went something like this:

You're planning something
I know you are
You are planning something
How can you try and explain mental health when i know you are planning something.
You are. You are planing something
You can't explain mental health when you a planning. scheming.
You are giving it away. I can see it. You are planning something.
And now I am challenging it, it is more obvious.
You are planning something
I have caught you out.
You don't want them to catch you do you? you know what will happen if do.

He mentioned something about knives and then disappeared.

Half awake moments

Your arms reach for me
They find me and pull me close
You kiss my back and run your hands over my waist, hips and thighs
You tell me you love me
We are locked together; a tangle of limbs that lie comfortably entwined
Our breath becomes one
You hold me so close
Safe
Secure
Warmth
Love
Don't ever let me go. I like it here.